Last weekend we have had a short statement of the new Mr. Puppy Europe 2019 Puppai Buumi, who was representing the UK at the contest, in our Darklands review. But today we want to present him a little more and talk about his campaign #LendAPaw, with which he wants to make us kinksters being aware of mental health issues. Hi Buumi, congratulations to your new title as Mr. Puppy Europe 2019. It seems that the next year will become a busy pupping year for you. Are you ready for it?
I am very excited for the year ahead and both my Fiancé and Bf are looking forward to supporting me on this new adventure. I already had quite a full calendar before becoming Mr Puppy Europe. I have my own pup event, Club Scritches, which is held once a month. I also had 18 events confirmed, the farthest sees me travelling to New York for World Pride in June.
Not only that, I am getting invites every day for pup and fetish events, prides and contests. I will do as many as I can, but it will be important for me to have time off for myself as well, as a big part of my title year is going to be about how we manage our mental health.
Puppai Buumi
Mr. Puppy Europe 2019
1982
United Kingdom
Such a title does seem to have its advantages, like to travel a lot to visit many events and to meet a lot of kinksters all over. However, it may sounds really nice but at the same time it can also become stressful for yourself and also for your beloved people. How can you avoid this kind of negative stress?
Mental health is a passion of mine. It begins by knowing your own limits, and learning to read your body so that you can manage yourself better when you have low mental energy.
Having been Mr Puppy Uk 2018, I look back and I definately took a lot on. I also learnt so much about my own self and how much I could effectively handle.
I attended 40 separate events and travelled over 70,000km. Not only did this put a strain on me, but it also put a strain on my relationship with my Fiancé Bonkerz and our boyfriend Tooklin.
For 2019, I will be travelling across Europe, and I have learnt that I need to schedule in weekends off to better manage my mental health and my relationship.
You’re totally right: Quality time is really important for all of us. But there are also other circumstances than just a lack of time, which can stress kinksters. Let us talk a little about newbies, guys who feel that they are into fetish and think that they are the only pervert on earth. Or guys who have been stressed by their coming-out and now they realise that they are not only gay but also guys who love to submit and to feel pain. What can they do?
Thinking back to my own experience as a new pup, I didn’t fully understand what it was. At the time, my boyfriend said no to the idea. He called me a few names, and that effectively stopped me from learning about myself really early on.
When I was able to research it more, the Internet became the best resource for this. I started seeing guys into pup play for the first time. This gave me confidence that I wasn’t alone, and it also gave me inspiration to experiment with the type of pup that I wanted to be.
I can name a handful of pups who inspired me on my journey, and I have been lucky enough to meet them all these past couple of years. As for the mental health of those still discovering themselves, and/or possibly doubting their validity. I would suggest speak to other kinksters online or at events, research support groups or seek support through traditional means. Or if that’s too much, speak to someone you can trust, opening up to the right person, even a little can help massively.
To communicate is essential and I think most of us have been happy also about the anonymity that the internet gives. It was also for me the way to step into the kinky world. But of course real kink is not virtual and it is important to do the step into real lived kink if you really want to become happy … or how do you see it?
Kink is different for everyone, and it is that diversity which both helps fetish evolve, but also it can cause disputes over ‘tradition’ and whether there is a right or wrong way to do things.
I think that with any kink or fetish, it is best to do a little research first, and then maybe take some simple first steps. Before then deciding how you wish to continue developing that kink for your own enjoyment. Also, remember, if a scene gets too heavy, it is your right to be able to withdraw consent and stop at any point.
Of course some kinks can be very dangerous, and having the right understanding, experience and equipment is key (including safety equipment). That is where events and classes really become useful, as you can see correct techniques demonstrated, while also learning about the risks to yourself and your play partners.
You’re totally right. That was also one of my motivation to start with sadOsam and to have also a lot of pages with background knowledge. But we want to talk about you and your campaign. Can you tell us, what is the idea of #LendAPaw?
#LendAPaw came about because of my time as Mr Puppy Uk, when I had a lot of pups message me. They were struggling with things like their pup identity, or their place in the community, and there were some pups who were struggling with their mental health. It was a something that took me by surprise, and of course I helped as best as I could as well as suggesting actual help.
#LendAPaw then grew out of that. It is first and foremost a Mental Health awareness campaign, looking to those in the wider fetish community to be aware of their own mental health. To be aware of others who may be struggling, and finally to be able to #LendAPaw if they are able to support those going through difficult times.
I have already had a lot of interest from people to help, and more importantly I know it has already helped at least one pup take control of their mental health, and to seek proper help and support.
How can everyone of us help and how can we support your campaign?
Well the first thing I would ask is, are you aware of your own mental health?
#LendAPaw is all about raising awareness, and it’s as important to be aware of your own wellbeing as those around you. If you do notice a post from someone on social media, or maybe you are on a night out and a friend is behaving differently. The first thing I would suggest is just try and strike up a conversation.
Start light and ask about what’s been going on in their lives, what have they been doing this week. Let the conversation evolve on their terms and if appropriate ask how they have been doing? Or, is there is anything you can do for them.
Everyone will be different, use your judgement, be supportive and not over bearing. If they don’t want your help at that point, let them know you are there, maybe suggest seeking better help.
We can only do as much as the other person will allow, and we shouldn’t force anything as that may just add to that person’s poor mental health.
But now you’ve to tell us about how we can support your campaign.
Once you are ready we have a Facebook group called #LendAPaw for mental health. We also encourage pups and people to take selfies with a #LendAPaw sign or use one of our #LendAPaw Facebook photo frames. (don’t forget to add the #LendAPaw to your comments)
Finally, I am hoping that people will be able to share their own stories. People out there struggling may be able to relate, and maybe even find new tools or techniques to help them manage their mental health better.
If anyone has any other ideas on ways to spread the #LendAPaw message feel free to contact me using my social media handle : Puppai Buumi
You’re really a pup with a message and mission. It’s really great that you have won the title. So what will be your next duties and appointments as Mr. Puppy Europe?
At the moment I am working hard to keep building momentum for #LendAPaw, while also trying to help with the organising of the K9 Camping in May.
We have our one year birthday of Club Scritches @ Eden Bar, Birmingham in a couple weeks, which I still have lots to organise.
After that we start to get into the warmer months, and I already have plans to attend Manchester Rubber Men 10 (MRMX), Euro Pride in Vienna and World Pride in New York, as well as being confirmed for two European Puppy contests as a judge.
In all those free weeks inbetween, I am also hoping to attend a few pup nights across Europe, with the hope of learning about the challenges they face, and trying to work with the national title holders to help them in some way.
So a very busy 2019 already and it hasn’t even been a week.
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