Any worries that I might have had, or any residual sympathy for me from my team mates, simply evaporated on the news that I was going to be doing porn DVDs. To these mostly sex-starved blokes the thought of having endless sex, and being paid for it, was overwhelmingly erotic – they didn’t stop to think about whether you liked fucking men, or women, or of being fucked, or of having to do this very intimate thing in public anyway…. They all started to ask Dan “How much are you getting?” And “How many women will he get to screw?”, and “Will it be an orgy – lots of blokes and lots of women?”, and stuff like that. They seemed to almost forget me, and I sat therewith my pint, and then had another, and another, and another as the usual after-match jollity deteriorated into the kind of bragging match blokes can get into where all the stories seem to start “Then one night I met this bird who….”
Julie wasn’t at all pleased as we got back really late, and the lunch had been sitting around for over an hour. Dan mumbled “Look, I told you we might be late, as Ray had that little thing to do for Steve… And after that, we all thought he deserved a pint….”
“Who, Dan? Ray, or Steve? And from the smell of you both, it wasn’t just ‘a” pint!”
“Both, of course! And you know how it is when we all get together – I mean, you have to stay in the drinking game, don’t you? They’d think it very odd if you upped and left…”
Julie came over to me then and put her hand on my arm, “I’m sorry, Steve. When Dan told me last night, I was really worried for you. But you seem to have survived. Are you all right?”
“Yes”, I mumbled… I’m not sure whether it was because my speaking was a bit fuddled with all the beer, or whether I was embarrassed at having Julie even know something as intimate as that about me – well, not ‘know’ as she already ‘knew’ I wasn’t circumcised then from when she was trimming my pubes. But to have a woman talking to me about my ‘skin – well, it was fucking embarrassing, I can tell you.
Still, Julie fused over me for the rest of the afternoon, bringing me big mugs of hot, sweet tea, offering me aspirins, and telling Shane “not to bother Steve, as he’s not very well”. Then she decided to take Shane out for a walk, and when Dan said he’d go too, she snapped “No, Daniel! You stay here and tell Steve how sorry you are for what you’ve had done to him. You can make him some more tea, or fetch him another aspirin if he needs one – a man who’s been through that shouldn’t have to keep getting up and seeing to things for himself. And, anyway you two men need to sort it out between you…”
“Jules, there’s nothing to sort out – he needed it done, and he’s a slave, and I’m his owner, so I arranged it, and that’s all there is to it.”
“I’m not listening to that nonsense, Dan! Steve’s not just a slave, he’s a man, just like you. How would you feel if someone came and did that to your cock? You’re always so proud of that foreskin of yours, – every night when you take your boxers off you stand there and fiddle with it….”
“I don’t…”
“You don’t even notice you do it, Dan, it’s so much a habit for you. But every night I watch you pinching it and pulling it past the end of your penis, then pushing it back off the head to have a proper look at yourself, and then pushing it back to cover it before you get into bed! You men seem to really like those little pieces of skin, and now you’ve taken that away from Steve – so you just sit there and tell him how sorry you are. When I get back I want you two men to be friends again. And make sure he’s comfortable, and has everything he wants, too!”
“Jules, please… We’re not friends! Steve is a slave, remember?”
“A slave who lives in the same house as us, who works with you, who we depend on to keep afloat financially…..”
With that, Julie turned and stalked out, and I sat back on to the sofa and flicked the TV on with the remote. Dan at once snapped his fingers, expecting me to hand it over.
“Hey, I thought it was me who was supposed to be a bit coddled this afternoon! The least you could let me do is choose the TV channel, Dan – it’s always you sitting there, flicking backwards and forwards….”
“Fuck it, Steve! I choose things like that in this house….”
“Julie said I was to be a bit…. ‘Coddled’, I think the word she used was. It’s little enough, to let me choose the TV channel….”
“Fuck what Julie said, Steve. We’re two blokes here, not some namby-pamby collection of bleeding heart women. And I’m your owner, and don’t you forget it. And what I say goes. Now, fucking hand it over!”
I shrugged, to show him I thought he was being a bit childish, especially as he then proceeded to select the channel I wanted anyway, as it’s the big match on a Sunday afternoon.
Dan came and sat and watched the match for a bit too, and then, after about twenty minutes of stony silence from both of us, he muttered “I reckon Julie’s right as usual, Steve. I am sorry – but it had to be done. And I can’t afford to pay for it….”
“Had to be done? Oh, fuck off, Dan! You never had any complaints about my cock with it on!”
“Steve, you’re being unreasonable. I explained about the breed standards – and you know yourself that you lost to Joe yesterday. And why do you think that is? I can tell you – it’s because when the Captain pulled Joe’s G-string off, everyone could see his cock head properly.”
“But Dan, it was part of me…”
“But it’s not needed. Like your appendix. You can do perfectly well without it. And millions of men do, after all….”
“So why didn’t you have yourself done at the same time?”
“Oh now you’re just being fucking ridiculous! I don’t need it done….”
“And neither did I!”
“Yes you did, Steve! Can’t you get it into your thick skull that you did need it done? With that little bit of useless skin on you, it’s unlikely that you’d ever again win a competition. And, as I’ve explained to you endlessly, we need the money. Now I’m not on show, so I don’t need to be done….”
We sat there in sullen silence for a couple more minutes, then Dan turned to me “I’ll still want your cock, you know… It won’t make any difference at all, once you’re healed….”
“A fat chance of that, for a few weeks…. And, anyway, what makes you think I’d want to fuck with you, after this?”
Dan moved closer to me on the sofa. “I could order you to fuck me, you know – and there are ways of making slaves obey…. But I reckon you want to fuck me just as much as I want you to do it to me. You’re not telling me that all that stuff you do to me is just a show…..” Dan went quiet for a moment, to let me think, and when I didn’t say anything he knew he’d struck home. So he seemed to get more confident, and went on “Anyway, you can’t fuck me now, Steve, but there are other things two blokes can do together, you know….”
I was still angry with him, though, and when he put his arm around my neck to pull my head close to him so that he could kiss me, I turned away and wouldn’t respond. He persisted, though, and I felt his other hand wheedling its way under the bottom of my T, and making its way up towards my nips. I winced, and gave a loud “Ow!”, as Dan’s fingers went to tweak my left nip.
“Fuck me, that hurts, Dan! That’s where that clamp from the rosette went on yesterday….”
He sounded really sorry then, as he muttered “I’m sorry, Steve… I forgot…..” “Forgot that I’m just some sort of prize animal to you, that gets put in shows, is made to parade around with a prize rosette on him like a piece of stock? That can be cut around, to please his owner?”
“You’re right, Steve. I forgot that you’re a man, too, and one I really like. I was wrong to have you ‘skinned, OK? Well, wrong to have it done without explaining it to you first.”
“…and asking me….”
“No, Steve. I don’t need to ask you, as you are a slave, you know. But when two blokes are close, like we are, well… I ought to have discussed it with you, so that at least you’d know what was happening…. And I admit it wasn’t a good idea to have it done in front of all the team like that, with them holding you down…. But I’ve explained that: I really can’t afford the hospital fees.
I was still rather gruff with him, but I’m not the sort of bloke that can hold a grudge for a long time. “Well I still reckon I didn’t need it…”
“Steve, it’s you who was complaining about losing out to Joe. And you must admit, when you see him standing there with that cock of his all exposed….”
I shrugged. “You may be right….”
“I know I am, Steve! Now, come here….”
This time when he pulled me to him and I felt his tongue pushing at me, I didn’t resist. Or, rather, I went on the counter attack and soon had him helpless under me on the sofa with my tongue deep down his throat, and his body thrashing around futilely under me as I mercilessly tweaked his nips. After a few minutes I let him up, still keeping him cradled in my arms, and we were both laughing. “So, Dan, what are we going to do now? I can’t fuck you…. Ray said!”
“I could fuck you though, Steve….”
“You know I don’t like that….”
“Well you’d better get your mouth busy then and make sure I’m drained… before I decide my cock needs some exercise, whether you like it or not….”
I pulled his jeans off really roughly, and I gave him no mercy as I plunged my mouth down onto his cock, and then licked his balls, and sucked them into my mouth…. And I nibbled at his ‘skin, until he was helpless with laughter and that wonderful sense that you don’t know whether something is fun, or tickling, or hurting… And when I then stopped, and began to wank him, refusing to stop and being really very rough with him, I reckon it was one of the best experiences he’d ever had.
When Julie got back we were again sitting primly apart on the sofa watching the TV, and she came up to Dan brightly and kissed him. “So, have you two boys made up, then?”
“Yes.”
“Steve?”
“I guess so….” I couldn’t help a small smile breaking out as I said this, as I wondered what she’d say if I really told her how we’d become friends again.
Well of course the next week was not all that great – I had to work, of course, and that’s very tiring, with the long, long commute. And there wasn’t much point in stopping on the way home from the station as I couldn’t fuck Dan or anything like that, and just fondling him and kissing him and stuff only made me even more frustrated. We couldn’t do a photoshoot or a Show or anything on the Saturday, of course, so Dan made me go in to the site to earn another day’s pay, which didn’t please me one little bit. And of course on Sunday the team was looking a bit sheepish when we congregated before the match as I think they’d thought that holding me down wasn’t a very nice thing to do. But afterwards, in the showers, they all wanted to take a look at me, and as the bandage was off by now I kind of stood there and held my cock in the palm of my hand so they could see all the really fresh pink skin surrounded by the darker bands of scarring…. And I even got an erection for them so they could watch: almost the first time that week that it hadn’t been painful. Several of the blokes asked me if it really hurt, as they’d sometimes thought about having it done as their wives didn’t like them getting into bed without going and washing their cocks thoroughly, and that was a real passion killer, and I could only shrug – I mean, you can’t admit to another man that you’re in pain, can you?
When we got home, though, Julie was looking worried. She clutched at Dan, and said “I think you need to take me to the hospital…. “
“The baby’s not due for another two weeks….”
“Dan, get me to the hospital, and stop trying to analyse everything!”
“What about Shane? Your mother’s not coming until next week….”
“We can leave him with Steve, Dan! That’s OK, isn’t it, Steve? Dan will come back later….”
I nodded , smiling.
“Julie, w e can’t leave Shane with Steve! He’s only a tiny kid, and Steve’s a big male slave…. You know how funny people are about things like that….”
“Dan, Steve’s a nice man, you know that.. A Really nice man. And most men do not interfere with small boys – statistically, even, it’s a minute number. And for someone like Steve, who we know and like, there’s absolutely no risk at all. Now, get my bag…. And Steve, look after Shane, please… You can let him have what he likes for tea, as a treat… I expect he’ll be upset as Dan and I are not here….”
There was a flurry of activity then as Dan raced around collecting stuff for Julie, and getting her out into the car. And before she left she leant through the car window and blew a little kiss at Shane. “Now, it’s a special treat that we’ve left you with Steve…. It shows your father and I trust you…. Remember, Steve is a slave, so you’re in charge! You tell Steve what you want for tea, and he’ll make it for you. And you can watch TV for an hour before bed, and you tell Steve which channel to put it on, as you’re the master and you choose things like that….”
I know she was only doing it to make little Shane feel important so he wouldn’t miss her, but all the same I knew there was enough truth in it to make me feel uncomfortable: in a few years time ‘little’ Shane really would be in charge as he was free, and I’d have to obey, as I was a slave.
Shane looked as if he was going to cry as Julie and Dan drove off, so I hugged him and told him he had to be brave and that mommy and daddy would soon be home again, and to take his mind off things I asked him what he wanted for tea and he promptly said “Beans on toast!”.
It was tough, I can tell you. I’ve got no experience of cooking and stuff like that – and especially not of looking after kids, very young kids. It took me ages to find the tins of beans, and the bread in the freezer, and little Shane soon was laughing as he showed me how to use the toaster. And he made me cut the corners off the toast “like mommy did for him”. He sat there then sort of doodling with his food and asked “Steve, why don’t you know how to do things like this? Mommy knows how to do toast, daddy knows, too, as he does it sometimes on Saturdays and Sundays. You’re a big man, Steve, why don’t you know?”
“Well when I was a boy, my mom didn’t like me in the kitchen much…. And when I was sixteen I left home…. And I’ve never lived by myself: I went into the army, and they provide all your food, as you always eat with your mates in the mess….”
“But you’re a slave now, aren’t you, Steve. On the TV all the programmes show slaves working in the kitchen. Why don’t you do that?”
“Well I’m not that sort of slave, I suppose. I work outdoors, on construction. And your mommy and daddy can’t afford a slave to work in the kitchen. You don’t want to believe all the stuff you see on the TV, you know…. Not everyone has slaves in the kitchen, only very rich folk.”
“So my daddy works in construction too, I know. He sometimes brings his hard hat home. So do you work with my daddy?”
“No. It’s kind of different – I actually do it: the digging and unloading and carrying and things like that on the site. Your daddy manages it – tells us what to do, marks out where we’re to dig, tells us where to put the stuff when the trucks arrive.”
“When I grow up, Steve, I’m going to be like daddy. It sounds more fun to tell the slaves what’s to be done, rather than having to do it.”
“Well it’s not more fun, exactly – it’s different. Your dad and I do different things on the site. One isn’t more fun than the other – they both have to be done if the building is to get built. And your dad has a lot of worries, a lot of responsibilities, if things aren’t done right.”
Shane carried on stolidly munching his way through his beans, making little patterns in the tomato sauce on the plate. “And does daddy tell you what to do when you’re at a slave show, Steve? Does he make you do things like go to bed when he says, and clean your teeth, and put your toys away….”
“Yes, I suppose he does. Not all those things exactly, but other things. He wants me to look nice, and show off properly, as he wants to win the prizes.”
“So daddy always tells you what to do? I don’t think I want to be a slave, Steve – when I grow up I don’t want everyone always telling me what to do. I think it’s better to tell the slaves to do things for me….”
I sort of grinned, and shrugged. I really didn’t want to continue this conversation. “But sometimes it’s OK to be a slave. Slaves can do things your daddy can’t, you know.”
Shane looked up. “Like what?”
I balled my fist, and flexed my arm, and the big muscles in my biceps stood out in hard profile as I pushed the arm of my T up a bit. “Well, like that! Look at my muscles…. You can’t do that, can you, Shane?”
He flexed his arm a bit, then shook his head. “Neither can your daddy. You have to work hard as a big strong slave to be able to do things like that. That’s what I mean when I say it’s just different – I can do things your daddy can’t, and he does things that I can’t do as I’m a slave.”
Shane nodded again, and I decided that was enough. “Now, didn’t your mommy say you could watch TV for an hour before bed?”
“Yes, Steve, and you’ve got to watch what I want…. Mommy said. And you’re a slave, and slaves have to do things like that, don’t they?”
I smiled at him, but felt a bit odd inside as of course it was true – I really had very little freedom of action. But I scooped him up out of the chair, half tossed him in the air so he began to giggle and laugh, and told him “…and this is what big slaves can do to little boys…. Now, come on….”
We sat together on the sofa and watched mostly cartoons, but when I said “It’s time for bed now..”, he looked up at me and replied “No, Steve. You’re a slave, and you have to do what I say. And I don’t want to go to bed yet.”
“But your mommy and daddy ordered me to put you to bed after one hour of TV, so that’s what I’ll do. Mommies and daddies can give orders to slaves too, remember – and I have to obey them, like you have to do what your mommy and daddy tell you to do.”
That seemed to satisfy him and I let him ride on my back up the stairs as I’d seen Dan do with him, then stood there as he cleaned his teeth, and pulled his pyjamas on. He looked so tiny and alone then in his bed, and his voice had gone all trembly and frail, as if he wanted to cry, as he whispered “Will mommy and daddy be back soon, Steve?”
“Yes, of course they will. Your mommy is just going to bring a lovely surprise for you, and daddy wants to be with her. But you go to sleep now, and when you wake up daddy will be here….”
I really am no good at this domestic stuff, and when he said “Can I have the door open, Steve? Will you come if I call you?” all I could do was say yes. And when I was half way down the stairs, I heard his tiny voice piping “Steve, Steve…..”, so I went up again.
“You’re supposed to be going to sleep, Shane…”
“Mommy and daddy always kiss me goodnight…. I want mommy, or daddy, Steve….” I thought he was going to burst out crying, and almost panicked – for fuck’s sake, what was I supposed to do?
“Well mommy and daddy aren’t here now, as you know…. But they’ll be back soon, I promise.”
“I don’t want to go to sleep, Steve…”
So I did what seemed naturel. I whispered “Shhhh… You need to be a big boy now, Shane. Mommy and daddy will be home soon… Now…..”, then bent over the bed and sort of tucked him in, and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. His little arms came up and held me tight around the neck, then he kissed me, and fell back into bed.
Fuck me, I was glad that was over! This looking after kids stuff was a lot harder than I’d imagined, and I tiptoed down the stairs as I didn’t want to make any noise, and then was worried about turning the TV on in case the sound kept him awake. So I went into the kitchen and thought I ought to clear things up, but I’d never really done washing up before, so it took a long time. And, frankly, I thought I deserved a beer then, and plundered one of Dan’s carefully hoarded cans from the bottom of the fridge – there wasn’t money to spare to buy a lot, I knew, and Dan probably had a record of exactly how many he had. But, what the hell…
I was asleep on the sofa when Dan shook me awake – he was really agitated, and I looked at the clock “Dan, for fuck’s sake, it’s two o’clock….”
“Steve, it’s OK! I’ve got another son….”
I came up from where my brain was still half asleep, then and slapped him on the back “Fucking great, Dan! How’s Julie….”
“She’s fine. We were only there an hour before she gave birth…. No problems, easy really. And I was there, watching…. But she sent me home now, as she wants to get some rest…. And…. He’s fantastic, Steve, seven pounds, looks just like me….”
He sort of collapsed on to the sofa then, and I went out into the kitchen and came back in with two more of the precious beers. I pulled them open, stuffed one into his hand…. “Cheers, then… Here’s to the new son, and mom, and dad….”
He clinked his can against mine. “Fucking hell, Steve: it was magic when Shane was born, but that was kind of, well, unplanned… But you know we sat down and decided we wanted another kid as we didn’t want Shane growing up all by himself…. And it was even better this time…. It’s incredible, Steve, to know that I’ve got two sons now, Shane and little Liam…. They’re going to be just like me….”
He saw me sitting there silent. “Hey, Steve…. I thought you’d be happy for me…”
“I am. You know that. It’s just… Well…. I’m never going to have sons, I guess.”
“I suppose not. But so what….”
“A man wants to leave something behind, Dan. When you’re old, you’ll have Shane and Liam to remind you of how you were now….”
Another of those thundering silences.
“Do you think you’d have got married then, Steve?”
“Dunno. It’s hard, especially when you’re in the army. Either you do it when you’re about twenty, or you don’t meet people as you’re always away, always moving around…. And now… Well, there’s no chance, is there?”
“Hey, Steve, when I’m making a lot more money I’ll buy a female slave for you, how about that…?”
I grinned. “At that rate I’ll be too old to fuck her! By the time you’ve paid for all the expenses of Shane and Liam, and they’ve left home and you’ve paid off the mortgage….. It will take for ever. I suppose I’d better get used to the idea that it’s me and my hand from now on….”
In that way that banter between two blokes – especially sexual banter – can suddenly turn serious, it did. The mood changed as if clouds had swept across the sun. Dan went silent for a moment, and looked straight into my eyes. “There’s always me to fuck, Steve…”
“A quick fumble on the way back from the station… Is that all I’ve got to look forward to?”
“Steve, you know how it is. I’ve got Julie, Shane, and now Liam…. I can’t risk losing them, Steve.”
I sat there silently. I realised I’d kind of slumped forward, resting my forearms on my thighs and not looking at Dan.
“Steve, please… Don’t be like that…. I need you, Steve….”
“It’s no good, Dan. It can’t work out. You’ve got the family. You’ve got a job, with prospects. I’ve got…. Nothing.” It took me a long time to say that, and I felt dreadful as the realisation came to me that although I wasn’t exactly jealous, I really did envy Dan and what he’d got.
The silence seemed to grow heavier and deeper. Then there was a faint rustle as Dan moved, and his arms were around my neck as he pulled me backwards from where I was slumped forward, and pressed his lips to mine.
Well, you probably know how it is. You don’t want to give in, you want to carry on arguing. But when the bloke you love is kissing at you and nuzzling your neck and his arms are running up and down your body….. A couple of instants later I was responding, and had Dan clasped in my arms and my tongue deep down his throat.
When we “came up for air” a few minutes later, I looked at him straight in the eyes. “I guess if this is all I can have, it’s better than nothing….”
“Steve, don’t be like that… It’s different with you… I mean I love Julie and everything….”
“…and fuck her….”
“Yes, that, of course. But I love you too, Steve. Just differently. I want to be with you, Steve, have you….”
“Dan, I love you too… But there’s one difference….”
He looked at me quizzically, and I half laughed. “I get to do the fucking, Dan….”
Well it was one of the more bizarre evenings I’d ever spent. We almost tore each others clothes off as we wrestled around on the sofa, desperate to feel the closeness and warmth of each other. But when I almost picked Dan up and had him straddle my thighs as I sat there, so that he could lower himself onto my cock, he pulled away fro an instant and got up. Coming back a few seconds later he reached around my neck and undid my chain collar, and I heard it clink as it fell to the floor.
“Now we’re equal, Steve…. At least tonight….. And, anyway, I can’t bite that lovely neck of yours with that chain in the way….” He tugged at my hand then, and in just the same way as he had with Julie the night before, led me up the stairs.
“…. It’s easier to fuck properly in bed, Steve….”
“But this is your room… Yours and Julie’s…..”
“You are stupid sometimes, Steve… It’s a bed…. Now come on….”
I’d never really fucked him properly, in a bed, before, and we were both excited and almost delirious with passion as we explored our bodies and tried all sorts of different approaches. It was as if my cock wanted to go so deep into him that we needed to pull each other around into exotic configurations in a vain attempt to press ever more close to each other. And then, afterwards, I cradled him in my arms and hugged him tight to me as we drifted off to sleep together – something I’d never done with a man before.
I woke up in the morning, suddenly aware of the delicious warmth of a body against mine. I was lying on my back, and Dan was half sprawled across me – one knee was between my thighs and I could feel his hard cock on my belly, and he was taking half his weight on one elbow as he looked down at me. “Come on, sleepy head… Time to wake up…”, he whispered as he traced one finger over my face.
“What time is it…. Fuck, it’s daylight… The train….”
“You’re not going to the site today, Steve, as I need to go and fetch Julie from the hospital and I need you to stay here with Shane.” His face came down and he kissed me then, and I tasted his night-soured breath – strangely, it seemed right, proper, and not at all unpleasant. I supposed I must be the same.
And so we lay there, watching the hands of the clock crawl around from 06:30 to 07:30 as we fucked again, only this time in complete contrast to the sexual frenzy of the night before… Now all was slow, and languorous, and lazy, as we explored every inch of each other with our fingers and mouths before I finally shot what I thought must be the biggest lode of cum ever deep into him.
I’d have stayed there all day, but Dan got up then, dragged the sheets off me, and slapped my bum. “Come on, slave! You’ve got work to do, even though you’re not going to the site…”
“What?”
“Get showered, we’ll get Shane up, then I want the car washed so it’s sparkling and clean for Julie. And then you’d better work out how to use the washing machine, as we can hardly leave the bed clothes like this…..”
I could see what he meant. And we both laughed, as we began the next part of our lives together. There was only just one tiny thing that scarred the day for me – as I came down the stairs, Dan picked up my collar and fastened it once more around my neck.
“I thought we were equals…”
“Sometimes, Steve. But Julie would think it odd if you weren’t collared, wouldn’t she?”
To be continued …
