Hello dear readers, I’m here today with the lovely pup Deek, a blue corgi with sweet puppy eyes that could melt your heart in an instant 😉
Say Deek, could you tell me how you first started your pup and kinky discovery journey? How did you first realized your likes, and started exploring?
My pup/kink journey started almost 10 years ago scrolling through the wonderful land of Tumblr (may it rest in peace). I was reading some Sherlock fan fiction when a pic of a human pup came across my feed. I remember stopping and just staring at the pic, studying it. A beautiful man on all fours, masked, collared, and IS THAT A TAIL?!
Something about this picture resonated within me and I needed to know more. It sent me on a deep dive into the world of pup play and I knew instantly I wanted to be a puppy.
Growing up in a conservative and very religious family, sex in any form was shameful. So when it came time to ask my partner, now ex, to see if we could incorporate pup play in the bedroom I was shaking with nerves. I wish I could tell you that he was open to trying something new and I wagged my tail off into the sunset but instead I was met with the words “ Absolutely not, that is disgusting, why would you ever suggest that?”
I was heartbroken for I was met with the same judgment I grew up with. So I became a pup in secret. When my partner was away I would take out the collar and tail plug I had hidden in my sock drawer and get on all fours. I began to explore my pup side. What bark best suited me? Do I feel like a BIG dog or a smol one? Was I more of a lap dog or a guard dog? My kinky double life began and I started to explore other kinks in the same manner: chastity, cbt, wax play, bondage ties. I would scroll through tumblr, find online communities and forums to help me learn how to achieve the things I desired and explored in secret.
This double life continued for 6 years until I finally got the courage to leave my abusive partner.
Ouf six years? I am lucky my only abusive one only lasted a few months. And that was already heavy. I am glad you still managed to pull away after such long time in such influence. Very brave indeed.
How was it for you afterwards when you were able to go out to play, and actually got irl positive feedback/encouragement on your kinks for the first time?
It was liberating! Being able to not only express myself sexually but openly without shame was life changing. I noticed almost immediately a positive change in my mood. Receiving positive feedback and encouragement also helped negate the negative self talk that I told myself, that i should be ashamed of my kinks, and help improve my self confidence.
The more I opened up, and was able to communicate my needs with my partners, the better our relationship dynamics became.
The biggest change in my life came from being openly kinky was the community I found. For the first time I didn’t feel alone in how I felt.
I was able to be myself fully without judgement and make friends who liked me for ALL of me.
What do you see kink as nowadays for you?
Kink for me now takes many forms. In some aspects like Chastity it has become a lifestyle. I’m locked more often than I am unlocked at this point. My pup side has become not just my kink but has become part of my identity.
Being a titleholder in the pet community and helping build a more inclusive safe place for people to be themselves has allowed me to also be Deek openly. I wouldn’t say that kink is an essential for me in the bedroom. But when looking to hook up or play it’s definitely what I search for first.
How does your pup identity part manifest/ show itself? And how come you’re so often locked? What does chastity mean to you?
Deek is confident, playful and full of curiosity and wonder. When I’m headspace all the noise of my day to day life dissolves and I can focus on being present and in the moment. I notice the small things in life that we tend to take for granted. Things as simple as batting around a ball or attacking a squeaky toy bring joy and play into my life. My curiosity gets peaked and it’s like I get a second chance to re-experience the world through different eyes.
Chastity for me, in the most ironic of statements, is liberation. Being locked long term I have a constant reminder that I’m a kinky fucker. It makes me feel sexy and empowered that I’m living my fantasies. With out being able to jerk off whenever I’m horny I find I’m more productive, my sex drive increases and I fall easier in to sub space. Consequently I’m able to push my boundaries further and discover more about myself in the process.
Ok last big question: You mentioned it before, but you’re also a Titleholder 🙂 With your background, from having no ability to live it out to standing on stage is quite a change. How was it to achieve that for you, and did you notice any changes in and around yourself afterward?
It’s crazy how much you learn about yourself running for a title. The experience opened me up to being vulnerable and talking about my past abuse. It showed me there is power in just being yourself and how to use my voice to make a change in my community. So much has changed since I won the title back in 2019. We changed the name of the title from Iowa Puppy to Iowa Pet to be more inclusive to all animal role players. We’ve started a kink education program, “Think Kink” to teach people various types of play with consent at the forefront of the conversation. We pushed to create a safe space for all people interested in Leather, Kink and Pet Play. Since doing so we’ve seen attendance at events grow and now I can go out to the bars on a Tuesday as see fellow pets in full gear lining their best life. It’s been an honor to serve my community the past 3 years during the pandemic and I’m so looking forward to see what my predecessor will accomplish.
Alright, thank you very much for your time Deek, it really was a pleasure. Got any inspirational Titleholder words for inspired newbie readers before parting ways 😉 ?
Thank you for this opportunity and I’ll leave ya with this…You are enough just as you are. You can be kinky as fuck without gear. You can be a pup without a handler. Your worth is not determined by anything or anyone but you.