So you like cum. A lot. Good.

There are many recipes on how to make fake cum. Some of them are made with home food ingredients etc. I’m not gonna cover all of them here. Instead I’m gonna talk about on a few cases that are more like cum lube etc. , and try to cover as much info about it as I can to give you extensive knowledge on what you’d may are about to use.

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Disclaimer

I am not a medical or chemistry professional. Merely an enthusiast. I compiled various sources from the internet I could find to give you the best information on fake cum recipes providable through that. I give no guarantees on the accuracy or healthiness of any information here. I will credit the sources so you can make your own judgement. Anything you do with the info in this post is up to you.
Additionally should you be a professional and have concerns on any recipes here, please contact me asap so I can change and notice it accordingly.

Alright let’s get started. Semen substitution is surprisingly complicated. There’s entire research papers on such. The most interesting thing you’re likely to stumble over when you look up fake cum is the following:

Methyl cellulose


What is Methyl Cellulose?

Methyl cellulose (or methylcellulose) is a chemical compound derived from cellulose. It is sold under a variety of trade names and is used as a thickener and emulsifier in various food and cosmetic products, and also as a bulk-forming laxative. Like cellulose, it is not digestible, not toxic, and not an allergen.

Methyl cellulose does not occur naturally and is synthetically produced by heating cellulose with caustic solution (e.g. a solution of sodium hydroxide) and treating it with methyl chloride. In the substitution reaction that follows, the hydroxyl residues (-OH functional groups) are replaced by methoxide (-OCH3 groups).

(source: Wikipedia)

What does that mean?

Pure Methyl Cellulose is edible. Non-toxic. Non-allergenic. Very non reacting to your body. Or body reacting to it. There are very rare allergic reactions to some versions. But that can be tested by the small patch on skin test.

It is eye safe, in fact, there’s even some eye and saliva drops that use it.

When eaten, it is not digested. That means, you’re not processing it in your stomach, and it goes straight as it is into your colon system. There, it attracts water and combines with your other stool, making it softer and bulkier. Hence the use as a bulk-forming laxative.

Should you eat it?

As there are various versions of Methyl Cellulose, it is recommended to only eat it when what you bought has written food-safe on it. And not in large quantities. Else you’re gonna get the side effects of overdosing, which is likely too bulky stool that causes stomach pain, diarrhea, and dehydration since it attracts water. So best don’t just guzzle it down, especially in powder form.

How much is overdosing?

Eeehhhm… unclear? Of course, medications using it always goes in grams and milligrams. It’s used very frequently in food additives too though, and even vegan meat replacements, since it’s so body safe and everything, which has more quantities of it. There’s no conclusive studies there. If you’re interested in what scientific studies were made, here you can find some:

Sagejournals

Publmed

It is used in a looot of things, due to its body safe, non-reacting properties. Medicaments, as thickening agent, in food, construction, etc. However the most interesting ones for us are that it’s used:

  • As a lubricant ingredient. Yes, you find it in lube.
  • It is used by the film industry when they’re in need of covering their actors in slimy goop. Remember the ghostbusters scenes. Or alien like scary goo coverings. Likely it was that stuff.
  • In Gunge. There’s a 30% chance that video of pic you saw of somebody getting splattered used methyl cellulose. Else likely guam gum or starch, most stuff what you’ll find in other fake cum recipes too. Because in the end it is pretty much just goo. And gungers know all about goo 😉
  • And last but not least is used in the porn industry as cum replacement.

There exist different versions of Methyl cellulose. For our purposes we’ll look at Pure Methyl Cellulose, Carboxymethyl Cellulose (CMC), Hydroxypropyl Methylcellulose (MC F50) and Hydroxyethylcellulose (HEC)

Their main traits are as such:

DefinitionMethyl CelluloseCarboxymethyl Cellulose
(CMC)
Hydroxypropyl Methylcellulose (HPMC) (commonly used food variant MC F50)Hydroxyethylcellulose
(HEC)
Water Retention
(keeping water)
LowLowHighHigh
E Nr.E 461 E 466E 464E 1525
ApplicationFood industry, unedible products, tooth paste, laxatives,diet pills water-based paints, paper products, detergents, etcFood, cosmetics, detergents, eye drops, tile adhesives, cement renders, gyspum products, etc.hydrophobic drugs capsule formulations, water-based lubricants, industrial applications, paint & coatings, ceramics, adhesives, emulsion polymerization, inks, construction, etc.
info by differencebetween.com and divenland.com

For cum lube most sources recommended pure Methyl cellulose or CMC

However it’s also noticable that most lubricants tend to use cellulose have HPMC or HEC, and so do special effects, likely since it’s more water-retaining. If you want to go for one of the latter two for the same reasons, MC F50 has more food uses in cakes etc, so it’s likely better digestable and easier to get for the purposes of our use.

I also do not know how safe is and which quantities are recommended for HEC for oral intake. I only know the component is used in hydrophobic drugs in capsule formulations.

links to products using HPMC: | RG SFX,
links to products using HEC: Durex Massage Play 2-in-1 | Swissnavy water based lubricant | Mister B water-based Lubes | K-Y waterbased Lube

Recipes


There’s various recipes on how to mix it. I’m distilling what most of them say here.

General advice

It is always recommended to experiment with small quantities to get a feel for things, and go upwards from there. The general mixing percentages I could find said to add around 1-2% of the cellulose (10-20g) to 1 litre of heated up water.

This advice is also recommended not least because depending on the type of your cellulose, the consistency can differ wildly.

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Disclaimer

This is not a tested recipe. I merely made some deductions, gathered good practices I could find from others and put everything into that which made sense to me. The ones to the right are used as partial basis for it. I’ve ordered CMC and HEC and colourings to test, and will update the article more accurately once I do get it. But if you already have experience or did test it yourself, please let me know how it went and if anything should be changed by mail. I’d be highly interested in hearing what you think of it 🙂

Ingredients


For 1 litre of water, use:

  • 10g of Methyl Cellulose or CMC.

or alternatively

  • likely just ~5g of MC F50 or HEC, as it’s more water retaining.

Additional options often used for more cum-like look and consistency:

  • Option 1: White Food coloring: 1-2% to 100% of water (10-20g)
  • Option 2: J-lube: Add until desired look.
  • Option 3: Baby Powder
  • Option 4: Spunk Lube (1:1 ratio apparently, so usable for smaller doses only likely)
  • Yoghurt (?) (Not usable over longer periods of time)

Needed Utilities:

  • Bucket
  • Mixer (best electronic)
  • Protective (painter’s) foil/plane

How-To


  1. Preparation. This is best done in your kitchen. Depending on how much of a messy worker you are, you might also want to prep some foil there.
  2. Heat up 750 dl of water. (can use hottest water tap temperature) Put 250dl lukewarm water to the side. Mix the 250dl with 2.5g – 5g of food coloring.
  3. Divide the 10g (or 5g) into 2 parts.
  4. If near boiling point, put the water into the bucket. Mix with 7.5 – 15g of food colouring.
  5. Add one part of the cellulose.
  6. Stir with the mixer until dissolved completely.
  7. Add the other half and continue stirring.
  8. Add the rest of the water and continue stirring until dissolved.
    1. (Add other options you want and stir until dissolved).
  9. Let rest for at least around 1 hour or more. Can use the time to put protective foil on your play area you plan to use for the oncoming fun.
  10. Enjoy!

This recipe is a SFX mix to their pure CMC sold mix. You may be able to use that as a base line for yours.

Main ingredient:

SFX Slime Recipe (CMC)

  • Thin viscosity “slime” = 45g powdered methyl cellulose to 1 gallon (~3.8l ) of water
  • Medium viscosity “goop” = 68g powdered methyl cellulose to 1 gallon (~3.8l ) of water
  • Heavy viscosity “double thick goop” = 90g powdered methyl cellulose to 1 gallon (~3.8l ) of water

2. Divide methylcellulose powder into two equal parts and set aside.

3. Heat 3 quarts of water to near boiling and transfer into a 1 gallon container (or larger)

4. Add one-half of the methylcellulose powder to the water and stir vigorously until dissolved.

5. Add the other half of the methylcellulose powder and stir vigorously until dissolved.

6. Add 1 quart of room temperature or chilled water and stir well.

This Recipe is from Instructables (by superpants)

It is originally made for gunge lovers, and not specifically made for methyl cellulane, but can be used for it. It says the following:

Measure out the following quantities of materials. I use plastic cups or a jug to do this, but a piece of folded paper will work as well. Quantities do not have to be precise, but it may help you make a batch the same in the future if you can be fairly accurate.

The water can go into the mixing container straight away.

Powder paint 160 grams (2%)

Thickener 96 grams (1.2%)

HOT water 8 litres

There will be variation in the properties of the gunge, most importantly the viscosity (thickness), dependent on the materials used. It is therefore worth experimenting with small quantities first before you make a large batch, until you have a goo you are happy with.


You will want to mix up in an area where a spilt mess can be easily cleaned up, so probably not your living room!

Start by mixing in the colouring into the water- 2% will give a good level of colour and opacity for most uses, but dependent on what you want to use your gunge for you may need to vary between approx 1% and 5%. Liquid poster paint (tempera) can also be used, but I wouldn’t recommend food colouring as it stains easily.

Water must be hot for the mixing to work correctly. If the thickening agent is dispersed into cold water, the thickener tends to drop out and form a jelly that won’t then mix correctly. I tend to use hot water straight out of the hot tap.
Add the powder into the water slowly whilst stirring thoroughly and keep stirring until you notice the water starting to thicken up. This will usually take a couple of minutes.

Leave the gunge to stand before using it. It will need time to cool, and as the viscosity slows convection, this will take a lot longer than ordinary water. The mix will take about an hour to thicken up to full viscosity- I often leave it to stand all night. Other thickeners may need a different length of time.

Food Cum Recipes


Ok so the upper one is fine for anal play etc. But you might don’t wanna guzzle it down anyways. If you’re the type that wants to taste and eat cum though, there’s alternatives.

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Disclaimer

None of these recipes are recommended for anal use. And especially not for vaginal. They contain sugars etc. that can lead to yeast infections in the latter.

The Xanthan Gum method

  • 1 dl warm water
  • 2.5 ml (1/2 teaspoon) xanthan gum
  • 3 teaspoons of liquid glycerin
  • (4 drops of grapefruit seed extract as preservative. )

How-to:

  1. Mix Xanthan Gum and Glycerin
  2. Add water and grapefruit seed extract and continue mixing.

Notes: Might be used anally if glycerin is medical grade (not food grade), as that’s common in lube, and grapefruit seed extract is removed. Some say food grade is fine, likely gonna irritate starting at around 12-13 minute. I say no guarantees on safety. Especially not vaginally. Your risk though.

Found on doctorclimax.com

An alternative Mix by a redditor

  • 2 pyrex glass liquid measuring cups.
  • 3/8 tablespoon xanthan gum
  • 1 tablespoon tapioca starch
  • 1 tablespoon coconut oil (can be solid, just make sure it’s food-grade)
  • 6 oz. (1.7dl) distilled water (or boil your water first then let it cool down to room temp — safety first, right?)

How-to

Microwave for 30 seconds xanthan gum and coconut oil in one pyrex measuring cup. This should just melt the oil.

Stir to make sure the xanthan is well incorporated into the liquid oil. ( The introduction of the oil will keep your mix from becoming stringy after your colon eats the water)

In the other pyrex cup, add 6oz of room-temp, distilled or par-boiled water. (We don’t want nasty parasites in our bits.) Add the tapioca starch to the water, stirring well to incorporate the mix.

The water / starch will appear a milky white. Microwave the water / starch mix until it starts to turn clear. This took ~ 60 seconds on my microwave. You do not want to over-cook the starch, as it will string if you do

Remove starch from microwave. Stirring constantly, add the xanthan gum / oil mix. Continue stirring until color is a consistent shade, without any streaks or lines. Let stand for 5 minutes. 	

After 5 minutes you need to re-stir the mix. This can be done by stirring, or you can transfer the goo to a bottle with a cap and shake vigorously. Once it cools down to room-temp (or uh, body temp) get yer freak on.

Note: I do not recommend putting it up your butt, as oils can bring infections, and degrade your sex toys. And starch contains sugars. But it’s your own risk.

source: Reddit

Sweet mix for those who aren’t into accuracy but like the look.

  • 250 ML water
  • 1 heaping tablespoon of cornstarch
  • 1 to 1.5 teaspoons sugar
  • (perhaps yoghurt)

How-to:

  • Put water in pan, turn on medium heat.
  • Put corn starch in, put on medium heat, stir until slightly translucent.
  • Mix all ingredients together and put on high heat for short boil.
  • Stir until smooth mixed. Let it cool for about 15 to 30 minutes.
    • (Add yoghurt after not too hot anymore and mix.)

Edible, but not vaginal safe for sugar infections risks.

Vegetarian, edible cum simulant. Apparently L-arginine is a component of real semen that gives its taste. End result of recipe around 1-1/2 cups.

Ingredients:

  • 1 cup water
  • 2 tablespoons corn starch
    • (can be substituted with xanthan gum)
  • plain greek yogurt or sour cream (to taste/consistency)
  • aquafaba (the liquid from a can of organic garbanzo beans, aka chickpeas)
    • can be substituted with eggwhite, will taste grosser)
  • salt to taste (recommended 1/8 teaspoon)
  • 2 850mg capsules of L-arginine (dietary supplement)

How-to:

  1. Put water in pan, turn on medium heat.
  2. Put corn starch in, put on medium heat, stir until slightly translucent.
  3. Put mix into bowl. Let cool.
  4. While cooling, make the aquafaba mix. Add salt for taste to the aquafaba. And best put the aquafaba through a kitchen mesh to prevent clumps in the “sperm”.
  5. When cooled, add the aquafaba mix into the bowl and stir until runny but thick, cum consistency.
  6. Add greek yoghurt or sour cream, one teaspoon at a time to get sour taste of cum right for you.
  7. Crush L-arginine capsules, Break open slowly add one capsule a time, to prevent clumps forming.

Found on ourhotwives.org

This mix from reddit claims to be very accurate, moreso than Bad Dragon’s cum lube apparently. I will list it here, but please, do read down, and don’t use bleach -.-‘ Not healthy, corrosive acid, can literally damage your throat and stomach walls.

Please don’t hurt yourself with this much bleach or even half this much. Contrary to other posts that assert the recipe is below the DOH guidelines, Google says there are 98.57 drops per teaspoon, so this recipe calls for about 25 drops per cup or about 20 times the DoH guidelines of 1.25 drops per cup (i.e 5 drops per quart).

Store Bought Alternatives


Magicmoneyshot ‘s Porn Cum Substance

J-Lube or X-Lube

Bad Dragon Cum Lube

Spunk Lube

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